How to give happier TODAY! (Giving Tuesday Dec 1, 2020)

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This special edition is out on Tuesday instead of the usual Wednesday because it happens to coincide with the worldwide GivingTuesday movement to encourage people to do good and inspire generosity, which results in many organizations matching your donation TODAY (only for most organizations) to make it 2x or even 3x!

If you’ve already lost interest in this post because you’re “not the type to donate money”, don’t stop reading yet. There are actually good and “selfish” reasons you should actually give money today! This is a judgement-free zone as to WHY you give, as long as you give. So if you don’t want to give for reasons like stopping climate change, saving the earth, or helping starving children, you can at least do it to make yourself feel happier.

First things first. When someone says, “Money doesn’t buy happiness,” my response to them is, “Then you don’t know how to spend properly.”

Money in and of itself does not lead to happiness. However, money can be a vehicle for happiness. Obviously one needs to be above the poverty line to feel a sense of security and safety (i.e., having reliable shelter and food), which are foundational human needs. And beyond that, money can buy happiness in multiple ways.

Spending money on others = More Happiness

One way money can buy you happiness is to spend money on others (i.e., participate in GivingTuesday!), or what’s called prosocial spending.

The phenomenon that spending money on others leads to happiness has been documented in different cultures across the world (North America, South Asia, Eastern Africa, and Southern Africa), across multiple income levels, and even in very young children. Thus, this seems to be a universal human feature.

In fact one study showed that, when participants were randomly assigned (i.e., told) to either spend money on themselves or others (i.e., they could spend received money on a gift bag for themselves or to gift it to a sick child), those who spent money on others reported significantly happier moods. Moreover, “This finding is particularly notable given that over 20% of the South African sample reported not having enough money to buy food for themselves or their families in the preceding year.” (Dunn, Aknin, & Norton, 2014).

There is actually also a way to get the most bang for your buck for prosocial spending, meaning, spending money on others in a way that will maximize your levels of happiness. Three conditions should be met.

According to self-determination theory (Ryan & Deci), humans have three basic needs; need to feel competent, need to feel connected to others, and need for autonomy (have free choice/free will). And studies have shown that, if prosocial spending is done in a way that fulfills these needs, you will feel even happier!

Prosocial spending and Competence = The more impact the prosocial spender perceives, the happier the spender feels.

Competence here is about the prosocial spender feeling that they have the ability to be effective in the world. One study compared donating to two different organizations, UNICEF vs Spread the Net. Although both have the similar mission of promoting children’s health, when one donates to UNICEF, it’s not 100% clear where the money exactly goes to, but for Spread the Net, the money goes to providing a mosquito bed net to protect a child from malaria. People reported feeling happier after donating to Spread the Net, because the impact was very clear and concrete.

If you already donate to UNICEF, this is not to say you should stop! This is making a point that if someone wants to feel happier when they give, they can choose a cause where they can see a clear impact.

Another way to think about “impact” that wasn’t studied by the researchers (whose research I was looking at for this post) is through the lens of Effective altruism. Effective altruism is “a philosophy and social movement that advocates using evidence and reasoning to determine the most effective ways to benefit others”. In the simplest term, it’s about making the MOST impact and it’s more about using logic and reasoning to give, vs how you feel. Here’s a example of how effective altruists think. Should you donate money to a homeless person on the corner of the street you walk by everyday or should you donate money to buy a mosquito bed net to protect a child from malaria? Emotionally, you see the homeless person everyday and you see their face and their suffering, and you can give the money directly to them and feel good about yourself. However, it’s not clear how this person will use the money you gave them, and whether it will help them actually get out of their situation. On the other hand, malaria can kill within 24 hours of symptom onset, and last year alone, there were over 400,000 deaths from malaria worldwide. And one of the most effective ways to prevent this preventable death is through mosquito nets. So if you were to look at the impact in terms of lives saved, there is a clear argument that your donation to buy a child a malaria net is more “impactful” because you are literally saving a life (or multiple lives).

Prosocial spending and Relatedness = The closer the connection the prosocial spender feels to the person they are helping, the happier the spender feels.

There are two flavours of this. First, people feel happier when they spend money on people whom they are closer to (friends, family) compared to those they are less close to (acquaintance, co-worker).

Second, people feel happier when they are able to deliver the money personally to the receiver compared to the money being transferred to the receiver by someone else. So going back to the above example of giving to a homeless person you come across daily vs an anonymous child in Africa, you may feel happier to give to the homeless person by hand than to the child through online money transfer to some organization. (Yes, opposite recommendation! But no psychological phenomenon is straight forward 😅).

Prosocial spending and Autonomy = The more (free) choice or intrinsic motivation the prosocial spender feels in their spending, the happier the spender feels.

The example the researchers documented here was kinda funny. In the paper, they were showing actual comments from participants of people who felt “forced” or “guilted” into donating to random organizations at the check-out at grocery stores (at least in North America, I don’t recall seeing this in Thailand). So it seems like if you want to maximize your happiness, don’t donate under those circumstances! (Not saying those causes aren’t good or they don’t have impact!)

Even subtle wording matters. In one study, participants were told that it was “entirely their choice whether to help or not” vs they were told that they “should help out.” People who helped in the first condition reported feeling happier - so despite engaging in the same action, helping, the psychological impact is very different!

In my quick research, I didn’t see the discussion around “identity” (who you are) and prosocial spending, but I will guess the following. With the GivingTuesday, if you feel that you “should” donate, you’re not going to feel that good. But if you see yourself as “someone who is generous, which involves donating,” then the choice to do so will come more freely and intrinsically, and you will feel happier to do so, also!

To summarize, to get the most bang for your buck in terms of prosocial spending and happiness, you want the giving to seem impactful (competence), be high on relatedness, and have the most choice (autonomy), to feel the most happy when you spend.

Bonus: Spending money on others = Better Health

Not only does prosocial spending makes you feel good, it literally can help with your physical health.

In a correlational longitudinal study, it was shown that in older adults diagnosed with high blood pressure, those who reported more prosocial spending demonstrated lower blood pressure 2 years later. Moreover, in an experimental study, older adults diagnosed with high blood pressure were given money to spend. They were randomly assigned to either spend money on themselves (personal spending) or on others (prosocial spending) for three consecutive weeks. Then after 6-weeks (of the entire study period), those who spent money on others showed lower blood pressure.

In another study, when students were given $10 to keep for themselves (personal spending) or to spend on others (prosocial spending), the more money the students gave away, the happier they felt afterwards. Interestingly, the more money they kept, the more shame they experienced, and this was correlated with higher levels of cortisol, a stress hormone, that has been shown to be detrimental to health if in the body chronically.

Another interesting finding that is related to my last post on the connectedness between the mind and body shows that, after donating to charity, people had increased physical strength! (Measured by how long they can squeeze a handgrip).

So not only is prosocial spending good for your happiness, it’s also good for your health! Which definitely relates to this post on how better social connections helps delay death and physical decline.

Because it’s the season of giving, wouldn’t you also want to give happiness?

What does the science say about the type of gifts you could give your family and friends that will bring them happiness?

The answer is; it depends on what type of happiness you want them to experience. (Science rarely gives you a straight answer 😅 So if it’s claimed otherwise, it’s probably not science).

I’m sure a lot of you have heard that spending money on experience makes people happier than spending money on material goods. But guess what, the science is now showing more nuance to this.

For the nerds who want to understand this in more detail, you need to understand a bit of the background on the research on prosocial spending and happiness. Researchers look at happiness from different perspectives (see below image).

There are three distinct forms and timepoints in which people can report their levels of “happiness” in their spending:

Anticipatory value: before the spending (i.e., the weeks or days leading up to the vacation or video game console you paid for)
Momentary value: actual feelings at the time of use of the purchase or as close as possible (i.e., wearing the sweater you bought or getting the massage)
Afterglow value: recalling how one feels after the purchase or the experience (i.e., “Think back to your last purchase…”)

(From Dunn & Weidman, 2015 “Building a science of spending: from the past and directions for the future”)

The finding that “spending money on experience makes people happier” have mainly been based on the Anticipatory Value (people are asked how much happiness they feel while thinking about a future purchase) and Afterglow Value (people are asked to recall a past purchase and think about how happy they felt or how much it contributes to their overall happiness).

However, in a newer study that actually tracked Momentary Value, it was found that

Material purchases and gifts led to more frequent momentary happiness. In the example of a new outfit, you get to wear the new outfit multiple times, so each time to pick it up you can feel happy to be using it. But the intensity of Momentary Happiness is lower than Experiential purchases and gifts.
Experiential purchases and gifts led to more intense momentary happiness. (“When you think about this purchase, how happy does it make you?”). But usually you can only experience the purchase or gift one time.

So turns out BOTH types of purchases and gifts can lead to happiness, it just depends on what type of happiness you want the receiver to experience!

However, zooming out to overall happiness, Experiential purchases and gifts still seem to win because it’s better for Anticipatory Happiness, higher intensity of Momentary Happiness, and also better for Afterglow Happiness.

Today’s action

GIVE TODAY! Even if you don’t care as much about how it benefits others, at least it will benefit your happiness and health ❤️

If you don’t know where to give, here are some organizations I support that have donation matching TODAY

Mission Blue, with a mission to protect the world’s Hope Spots, special places that are scientifically identified as critical to the health of the ocean , is also part of Giving Tuesday, but you have to check if your own company will match your donation to them. You can check directly the eligibility on their website here.
Nature Conservancy of Canada (NCC), a land conservancy working to safeguard the lands and waters that sustain life, is also part of Giving Tuesday, where your donation on this day will be 2x. Donate to NCC here.
Protect our Winters (POW) Canada, an organization of outdoor enthusiast and professional athletes advocating for policy solutions to climate change, a is doing a Giving “Threesday” (instead of just Tuesday) where your donations will be matched 3x. So if you donate $25, your donation grows to $100! Donate to POW here.

And if you don’t want to donate to an organization, you can still give to your friends or family to get an immediate happiness boost, ideally something Experiential, but ok if it’s Material also.

Let me know who or what you’re giving to today!

Until next time, Transcenders!

~Pylin

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P.P.S. I’d love to hear from you! Let me know if you love a topic, don’t like a topic, want to hear about a certain topic. I’m all about learning from others and connecting! Email link below or pylin@drpylin.com